Dear Lily,
On this day before we start the journey to meet you and bring you home, my heart is so full of things I want you to know, things that have been on my mind and in my heart for almost 6 years. While the wait for you has been difficult, I would do it twenty times over just to get to you. In the beginning, I would dream about the day that your nanny would hand you to me. I would wonder if I would cry and scare you or if I would be able to make you smile as I reached out my hands to you. Those dreams sustained me for a long time, every day passing and, although I didn't know at the time, bringing me one tiny step closer to you.
My sweet baby girl, I hope some day you will know just how much I wanted to be your mommy. You were chosen to be ours. We will bring you home where you were meant to grow and be happy. I promise you this, my precious child, that I will do everything in my power to give you a good life. I promise to nurture you when you are sick, wipe your tears when you cry, cheer you on through every school program, recital or tee ball game. I will bake you a birthday cake every year and sing lullabies to you, trying my best not to hurt your ears. I will brush and braid your hair until you fall asleep on my lap. I will comfort you through boo-boos and heartbreaks. I will hold you close to me as long as you need it and, when you grow, I will let you go and watch you become the beautiful woman I know you will be. I promise, Lily, I promise.
You are my every dream come true and, even when you have temper tantrums, I will remember this. In a few days, I will hold you and lead you away from everything you have ever known. I know you will be hurting and sad. I will do my best to be patient and remind you every minute that me and your daddy are here to stay and will never, ever leave you. I promise you that you will know the beauty of the place that gave you to us. You will know your heritage and we will make it a very important part of the rich melting pot that is already our home.
I love you Lily. I have loved you since the day I was born, for I was born to be your mother. Every step of my life has led me to this point and being your mommy will be the most important thing I will ever do. Our journey together through this life begins in just a couple days. I can't wait!
Love always and forever,
Your mommy
3 comments:
you must print and save this beautiful letter in her memory book...she will treasure it later
Beautiful, you will be a wonderful mommy.
What you said about having loved Lily all of your life reminded me of my great grandmother. When I was 19 I was able to fly across the country to see her for the first time since I was a baby. She was very frail and weak. When I went to her bed to hug her she dried and held me so tight. You never could have believed how tightly her thin little arms could hold me. And she said over and over again, "All of my life I have loved you, All of my life I have loved you." It was the most powerful thing anyone has ever said to me. And I didn't even fully understand it until I was trying to get pregnant.
A mother's (or a grandmother's) love is such an amazing and powerful thing. And I know that even from halfway around the world Lily is feeling your love right now. Best wishes to your family in the coming days. I know the love you all have for each other will see you through anything.
-Jen-
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