My blogging is still sporadic. This I know. This past year has been a booger for me. So many changes in jobs, life, and mental state. I don't deal well with change (which should be evident by my blog) and it has made me feel a little out of control lately. I have lost the gumption of my diet and gained back a good amount of the weight I worked so hard to lose. I am still on orientation at work and not quite in the groove there yet. Jeff is still working out of control hours and I have lots of nights at home by myself to ponder life and existence. Sometimes I struggle with negativity and have been REALLY engaging in this struggle lately.
One of my instructors during orientation this time around said something that has stuck with me and that I am trying to remind myself of every day. He said that we are like pitchers, pouring out what's inside of us. If we are filled with nastiness and negativity then that's what we pour out. If we are filled with love, positivity and exuberance for life, then that is what flows. I am trying hard to work my way through this one and be more filled with joy and love for life than with negative thoughts and bummer-istic tendencies. But it's hard sometimes.
I am not going to make unrealistic aspirations for myself but, over the next few weeks, I would like to make a few goals.
1. Be a little more thankful for what I have. Consciously survey my blessings and pour out some joy.
2. Prioritize my health again. Exercise 2-3 times a week and cut back on this out of control eating. Go back to Weight Watchers weekly.
3. Spend some time with my family if at all possible. Brandee is so close but I haven't seen her in a while. And Jason has a new house that I haven't seen. I miss everyone.
4. Finish clearing out this house and get ready for the new carpet. If I de-clutter my house, maybe life will feel not-so-overwhelming.
That should be enough for now.
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